


dark victory

by anathebookworm



Category: The Walking Dead (Telltale Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Mari still dies, and really love Kate despite so many others hating her, i'm sorry everyone but i ship Javi/Kate, kinda of, life in Richmond, rescuing AJ
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-04
Updated: 2018-09-26
Packaged: 2018-11-09 03:40:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11096130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anathebookworm/pseuds/anathebookworm
Summary: After things settle down in Richmond, Clementine is ready to go look for AJ once again. But she’s not going alone.





	1. bloody business

**Author's Note:**

> This is the result of several prompts I received on tumblr regarding clem x gabe. If you want to send me stuff you'd like to see included here later, my tumblr is teenagezombiegentlemen.

“I love you, brother,” Javi croaks out between pained breaths.

The gun feels cold and heavy in her hands, and its _click!_ still sends a shiver down her spine. No matter how many times she holds it, things never get easier.

But.

Sometimes there just isn’t a way out. She can pretend she’s pointing a gun to just another walker—like Jane once said—but that’s not how it works. It’s a person. A breathing, living person. Someone with a future that can be taken from them in a second.

But.

She has no choice. In this world, things have a way of spiraling out of control more quickly than Clementine ever thought possible.

But.

Seeing David trying to kill Javi, his brother and her friend, _her friend_ , all she can see is a scene that can never be forgotten.

She can almost taste the bitter cold on her lips, feel the snowflakes on her cheeks. The snow pools at her waist and, in front of her, Kenny and Jane wrestle.

They scream—Kenny filled with uncontrolled, irrational rage; Jane with fear, so tangible and so real and so frightening—and the gun gleans in middle of all that snow.

She picks it up—and its weight is so terrible, so dangerous, pulling at the strings of her heart—and the choice is clear.

Only…it’s not a choice she can make. At least, that’s what she thought at the time. She loves Kenny, he’s her last string to Lee—Lee, who will be forever missed, forever remembered—but Jane…she is her last string to Luke.

And whose memory she needs the most—her mentor or her pseudo-brother?  
She needs both, wants both.

But she can only have one.

Her fingers shake so much when she pulls the trigger, and she doesn’t stop shaking until the end of the day.

But.

The choice is easier now.

She’s learning how to stand David, how to understand the way his mind works—Lee would have wanted for her to give people a chance, no matter if they wronged her in the past.

But.

She _won’t_ choose David. _Can’t_ choose him, really. If she weights it down, he means nothing to her—not the way Javi does. Her bond with Javier still isn’t as deep as she believes it can be, but he feels like a link to her past. A link to Lee, Luke. His heart, his actions, his friendship…it all takes her back to those she lost.

Deep in her heart, Clementine knows he won’t be around forever. Knows his fate—like everyone else’s in their world—is already sealed.

But.

It doesn’t matter.

She still needs his friendship, can’t let him go yet. One small look at Kate—so terrified, hands in her mouth as silent tears run down her cheeks—and Gabe—forehead bleeding from where David hit him, eyes wide like he couldn’t ever choose between the two men—is enough for her.

Clementine shoots and, this time, her hands don’t shake.

When David groans, clutching his shoulder—she didn’t aim to kill, wouldn’t ever again aim to kill after what happened with Kenny—she wastes no time. The walkers near the generator seem to realize they have been fooled and start dragging themselves to her and the struggling family.

She shoots one more time, taking down a walker, before grabbing both Javi and David. The brothers seem stunned, faces ashen, but still allow her to drag them back to safety. From the corner of her eye, Clementine sees Kate helping Gabe as well.

When they are safe—for now, because no one is ever safe enough, never for long enough—and the walkers groan and moan and growl on the outside, David punches the lockers, as loudly as he can.

“Hey!” She exclaims, gun still in hand. “You want the things to stay around?”

“Fuck you—”

“No! Fuck _you_! What the hell is wrong with you?” The gun slips from her hand, though she can’t say she isn’t grateful for this. “You need to calm down or—”

“You _shot_ me! You don’t get to order me around after _you fucking shot me!_ ”

“Stop!” Gabe cries from another corner, nestled between Kate’s arms. Seeing him like that…so innocent, so scared, so pure, reminds Clem of Sarah. Once upon a time, another person she lost. Her face softens. “P-please, just…s-stop fighting.”

With her arms raised in surrender, she walks as calmly towards him as she can. “Gabe, I’m sor—”

“Don’t start the bullshit! Everyone knows you’re not sorry for anything!” David bellows, clutching his shoulder with one hand and pointing an accusing finger at her with the another.

“David, please,” Javi whispers, his hands brushing with Kate’s briefly before he tries to approach his brother. “We need to stay calm, start thinking about a way to get out of here without becoming food for the _muertos_.”

“I _had_ a way out! If you just listened to me—”

She tunes they both out, knowing that this time things are bound to stay calmer. David is hurt, he wouldn’t be able to attack Javi again.

With a sigh, Clem restarts making her way to Gabe, smiling when Kate gives her an approving nod.

“Gabe, are you okay?” Clementine starts, her eyes moving to the gash in his forehead. Doesn’t look too deep, the blood even stopped flowing already. Good. Means David wasn’t really trying to hurt Javi, wasn’t using all of his strength.

Her friend remains silent, crying softly in Kate’s shirt. _Shock_. That she can recognize, has enough experience with it.

“Gabe, look at me,” she pleads, smiling when he does as she says. “Can you even your breathing? Look, see how I’m breathing. Copy that. Okay? Deep breaths, count to three. Okay?”

He keeps nodding and nodding, and after a few minutes he manages to calm down enough to recover his presence of mind. In the background, she can still hear Javi and David’s voices, but they sound softer now. Less angry. She doesn’t look though, doesn’t break her eye contact with Gabe.

“Are you feeling any better?” she asks, searching for his body’s answer before he can even open his mouth.

“Yeah,” he breathes out after a moment, disentangling himself from Kate. “Yeah. I’m…okay.”

“Good,” she says with a smile, allowing Gabe to move to where his dad and uncle are speaking.

Before she can get up and follow him, Kate mouths a silent, “ _Thank you._ ”

Clementine nods and walks to the brothers. The first thing to catch her eye, though, is how Gabe clutches his uncle’s arm despite the look of concern directed to his father.

“We need to go before it’s too late, _mi hijo_ ,” David says, eyes soft despite his hard expression.

“I’ve changed my mind, Dad,” she hears Gabe answering. “I-I want to stay with Javi, here. I want you to stay with us, too.”

“There’s no place for me in this city,” David whispers with what looks like a scoff. His hurt is evident to her, though. “No place for me in the family either, as it seems.”

“Bullshit!” Javi exclaims almost angrily, defensively. “You said it yourself, David. We’re together again. All of us. Isn’t this something that deserves a chance? Doesn’t our family deserve another chance?”

“And how exactly do I fit in your perfect family, Javier? When you’re sleeping with my wife?”

“It’s…it’s not like that. We…I…it’s hard to explain. We thought you died, mourned you for years. And it...we didn’t plan for it. I fell in love. That’s…that’s the truth.”

Clementine feels bad for them, feels like she’s eavesdropping on something important. A family moment. Brotherly moment. But then again, Gabe can also hear their every word. Kate as well.

David clutches his head with both hands, shoulder forgotten for now. “I…it’s too much, Javier. My head can’t process everything.”

“Just stay with us. Please. We…we are family, despite everything.”

She feels pity for David then, and decides to intervene and give him at least more time to think.

“Look,” she starts, “we need to move first. The walkers are close, and staying here is doing us no favors. I say we go outside, get on the bulldozer and help Richmond.”

“I’m with Clementine,” Kate announces—as Clem predicted, really. Though Kate’s eyes are so, so aware. She looks like she knows exactly why Clem said that the moment she did. “Richmond needs our help—and I’m going to do my best to fix what we did to them.”

“I won’t leave you two,” Javi says, face hard and defiant. “If you want to stay, then that’s what I’ll do, too.”

Kate beams at him, but Clementine focuses on waiting for David’s reaction. Whatever he does and says will influence Gabe’s decision—no matter what her friend says, she knows that he won’t be able to leave his father. She can understand, respect that. If Lee was here, she would stick with him no matter what.

“I still don’t think there’s anything for me here,” David starts, eyes solemnly focused in Gabe alone. “But I…I’ll do whatever Gabriel wants.”

Everyone turns to stare at Gabe expectantly, and Clementine holds her breath.

“I…I…” Gabe shakes his head, looking overwhelmed with the amount of attention he’s receiving. He decides to look at her and smiles softly. “I’m with Clem, then.”

The returning smile that breaks free in her face is instantaneous and a bit unexpected, but she doesn’t fight it. Instead, she nods victoriously to him.

“Alright,” David says in a defeated voice before anyone can. “But after we’re done here—and if we don’t die, which I think we all will—I’ll be gone. Won’t stay in Richmond.”

“But, Dad—”

“You will _not_ discuss with me, Gabriel.”

“Brother, we can think this through first—”

“You will not discuss with me either,” David cuts Javi off angrily.

Kate seethes in her place near Clementine, her arms crossing over her chest. “Okay, David. We get it. You want to be a martyr, make we all the bad guys. You’re free to do that. But none of us want to hear your self-deprecating bullshit right now!”

“Kate!” Gabe exclaims, always ready to defend his father.

“No, Gabe. You know it’s true. He wants us all to feel bad about our actions, but what excuse he has? We were on our own for years. And before that? Before the _muertos_? He never cared about us!”

“You have no right—”

“But I do, David! I was married to you, remember?” Angrily, she takes off her wedding ring and throws it at him. “Well, good news. I’m not anymore. You can have your ring back. I don’t care. All I do care about is that you will not treat us like your shitty soldiers.”

His eyes narrow. “Are you threatening me?”

“That’s enough!” Clementine says, pulling both adults away to grab the AKs on the locket. She keeps one to herself and gives Javi the other. “Are we going outside or not?”

Javi jumps at the opportunity to break up the fight—at least for now—and moves to their exit. “Let’s go,” he says.

“Wait, what if I need to shoot one of the _muertos_?” Gabe asks, eyes jumping from one AK to the other.

Clementine smiles and offers him her old gun. “You can have my pistol.”

“I’ll drive,” Kate says, moving to stand beside Javi. “If that’s alright?”

Javi squeezes her hand. “Of course. Your driving skills are definitely dangerous to every walker around,” he says playfully, to which both she and Clem roll their eyes.

“I’ll go on the motorbike, make sure the path stays clear,” David says, eyes still as narrow as slits. When he stops near Kate, he hisses, “This talk isn’t over yet.”

While he doesn’t say anything—probably afraid to keep the fight going on for longer than necessary—Javi answers his brother’s threatening tone by snaking one arm around Kate’s waist.

“Are you ready?” Clem asks Gabe before they open the door.

He shudders. “Not really, but…we can do it together. Right?”

“Right,” she says with a smile. “They won’t hurt any of us. But, you know…it’s okay to be scared. I’m pretty scared.”

“Really?” His eyes shine—though she can’t decipher which emotion is there. “I…I…I’m going to tough for us, then.”

She smiles, her hand itching to touch his for a moment—to offer any sort of comfort. Jane liked to touch her shoulder when she needed comfort, maybe that’s something Clementine picked up. But even then, she doesn’t touch him. Doesn’t know why either, but has no time to dwell on that.

“Everyone ready?” Javi calls. When he receives a flurry of nods, he opens the doors and they start shooting.

* * *

 

In the end, it turns out that everyone can cooperate despite their differences. They seal the breach that’s allowing the walkers to pool inside Richmond, and start cleaning the city as best as they can.

Three days later, things start looking better—at least, it looks way better than many things Clem has seen before. People decide to hold some sort of memorial for everyone that died trying to help—even Conrad is honored there, much to Clementine’s chagrin. They glue pictures of the fallen in one of the walls in the church, and it’s…beautiful. Clementine wishes she still had that picture of Lee—or that drawn of Duck, Katjaa and Kenny.

She fingers her cap while thinking about them, those she lost many years ago. So many people. She doesn’t have enough fingers and toes to count them—and doesn’t have anything to remember them by. It…hurts. Makes something inside her heart shatter. How is it possible, that every single person cares about ends up dead?

Or worse—ends up as a walker. Luke is probably a walker now, deep down in those waters. Kenny, too. She didn’t find it in herself to shoot his head, and that means he probably turned. And then…then there’s Jane. She couldn’t shoot Jane either. And…and there was Omid. Neither she nor Christa could shoot him.

The only walker who once was someone she knew that she ever managed to put down was Lee, and that was because he begged her to do it.

Clementine barely feels the tears running down her cheeks as she hugs the cap her dad gifted her with, so long ago.

A hand on her shoulder makes she jump and reach for her gun—only to find the pistol is gone. With her heartbeat frantic, she spins around.

Only to find it’s Javi, with an apologetic smile plastered all over his face.

“Sorry,” he whispers. “I kinda forget how jumpy people are these days.”

She nods slowly, willing her heart to calm down. _It’s okay, it’s okay. Walkers are gone for now._

“Did something happen?” she manages to ask after a few moments.

“No, nothing,” Javi says with a small frown. “Just…worried about you, Clem.”

“I’m fine,” she answers, the back of her hands running over her cheeks.

“You were crying, Clem. It…it’s okay to…you know…feel sad. You can speak with me, if you want. I mean, I know we don’t know each other for that long…but I like you. And I hope…the feeling is mutual.”

She smiles a little at him. “I like you too, Javi. I was just…thinking about things I can’t change.”

“Oh.” His eyes drop to the photos on the wall, and he sighs. “I’m sorry. I…”

“It’s alright,” she says, waving him off. “I was just thinking that I wish I had photos of everyone I met, you know? Or at least something to remember them.”

“But you have something,” he answers, hand flying to touch her forehead first and then moving to her heart. “You have memories. Good memories, right? No one can ever take that from you.”

“But…but pictures would be so much better…”

“You still love them, don’t you? That won’t change, Clem. With or without pictures, your love for them—and their love for you, I’m sure—will always be there.”

“It’s just hard,” she whispers, not really fighting the tears now. “I miss everyone so…so much.”

“I know. But still, cling to the good memories. I know that’s not going to be enough sometimes, but…but never forget to remember. My family always said that while we still remember those who are gone, they’ll find a way to live.”

She nods. “Okay.”

“Now, I think Gabe’s looking for you. He was by the town square with Kate last time I saw him.”

“Really? I didn’t get to speak with him these last days,” she says with a sigh.

“Yeah, I think that’s exactly why he wanted to see you. Little guy has the biggest crush on you, Clem. But don’t tell him I said that, alright?” Javi winks, his playful mood back full force. Sometimes she thinks he’s more of a kid than AJ ever were. But either way, her face goes hot at Javi’s words—much to her embarrassment. And the man doesn’t miss her now red-colored cheeks. “Oh! _Oh._ You have a crush on him too! Aww, Clem. You guys have my blessing.”

She shoulders past him a little more roughly than necessary—though he still seems to find it funny, since all it does is make Javi chuckle louder. “You keep talking, and I’m going to find something to stab you with,” she warns with an almost-serious glare.

“Awww, Clem,” he repeats, still smiling from ear to ear. “That’s kinda cute, you know? I really hope you two get together one day. Like I said, you have my blessing. Probably have Kate’s, too.”

“It’s not…it’s not like that, Javi,” she insists, shaking her head in hopes that her hair can cover part of her flaming cheeks. “You know things are always more complicated than that.”

“It’s only complicated if you make it complicated,” he says. “Plus it’s obvious you guys feel something. What can be wrong in exploring it?”

“ _Javi…_ ”

“The sooner you admit it, the sooner you’ll stop feeling embarrassed about it,” he almost sings it, and _oh my God, is this what it feels like to have an older brother?_ If that’s it, then she’s glad her parents only had her.

Groaning, she makes her way out of the church, away from Javi’s sight and teasing. She just hopes she can manage to calm down enough before she finds Gabe. If she appears with her face as red as that, he’ll start thinking the wrong sort of thing.

“Hey, Clem!” She spins around to find both Gabe and Kate waving excitedly at her. Rubbing her cheeks, she makes her way to them.

“How are you, sweet?” Kate asks with a polite smile. “I…I hope things have been less…difficult for you now…”

“I’m fine,” she answers with a nod—more to reassure herself than Kate, though. She _is_ fine. Have been through so much already, there’s no reason she won’t get over this. “How are you guys?”

“Honestly as good as we can,” Kate says. “Still shaken up about everything that happened here…but I think it’s going to get better now. Right?”

She’s about to answer when Gabe coughs and nudges Kate with his foot. “Hey Kate, isn’t that Javi? I think he’s calling you,” he says.

“Oh, yeah?” Kate looks around before shrugging. “Better check what he wants then. See you later, Clem.”

“Javi’s still inside the church,” Clementine says with a disapproving shake of her head once Kate is out of earshot.

Gabe shrugs—though his cheeks color a little. “Well, yeah, but Kate doesn’t know that. She needs to give me a break. I mean, I love her. But I need to breathe, too.”

“She’s just worried more walkers will appear, I guess.”

“I think I proved to her already that I can take care of myself around the _muertos_ …uh, walkers? Whatever,” he says with a proud puffing of his chest.

“Hmm.”

“So…”

“Yeah.”

“I mean, I…kinda…didn’t see you around since we sealed the breach,” he blurts out after staring at his feet for a long moment.

Clementine sighs. “Yeah,” she repeats. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry. I was just…I needed some time to think. Put my thoughts back in their place.”

“Is there…something I can do to help?”

“Unless you have a camera?” She snorts. “Sorry. I’ve been thinking about cameras a lot, ever since people started putting photos on the church.”

“Well, I know that’s not something that will _really_ help, but we could…search for a camera in the town. And take photos of each other, just in case. You know?”

It’s such a great idea—she’d love to have photos of him, Javi, Kate, everyone possible. Anything to help her remember their faces. It’s tough to get to terms with the fact that she almost can’t remember how Lee looked, sounded, any longer.

But—

“You honestly think we’ll find a camera, just like that? Lying around?” she asks with her shoulders slumping down.

Gabe nudges her feet like he did with Kate before. “I think that we won’t know if we don’t try.”

“But there’re tons of useful things we could do instead, things to actually help the town,” she insists—though she _really really really_ wants to search for that camera.

“Okay, so what about this—we search today, and if we don’t find anything, we help the town?”

“This sounds like something I can live with.”

“Great! Where do you want to start?”

* * *

 

It takes them five hours of constant searching, but they find a polaroid in one of the abandoned houses—though making sure to never venture too far into places people aren’t around. But a _working_ polaroid? Completely worth the trouble.

“Smile!” Gabe exclaims before she feels like she’s gone completely blind by the flash of the camera. “Oops. Hit the button too soon.”

He shows her the photo and she grimaces. Her hair is mess—she needs to seriously consider a haircut soon—her face is dirty and she’s frowning to something the camera couldn’t see.

“It’s really awful,” she says with a chuckle, staring at the picture before giving it back to Gabe. “Maybe you could take another?”

He nods excitedly and points the camera to her again. “Ready?”

She tries to remember how she used to pose for photos, how to smile properly, where to actually look. But she doesn’t remember any of that—and supposes it doesn’t really matter, since they are taking the photos for themselves.

“Ready.”

The flash blinds her again, but this time she doesn’t blink until the photo is in Gabe’s hands. He offers it to her again, waiting for her inspection.

Her face and hair are still the same than before—and she looks slightly awkward, trying to pose—but she likes the photo.

“It’s good, I guess,” she says with a smile, though she still gives it back to Gabe. “You want to keep it? So you never forget me.”

“I doubt anyone can ever forget you,” he mutters, probably not meaning for her to hear. “Thanks, Clem.”

“Not so fast.” She grins, snatching the camera from him. “I need your photo now.”

He shrugs before trying an awkward—though sincere—smile and making the peace symbol with his left hand. She takes the photo and smiles at the result before showing it to Gabe.

“I like it,” she says. “Thanks for letting me have it. I…I wish I had pictures of everyone I met since the world…died.”

“No problem,” he answers with his cheeks pink. “You want to look for Javi and Kate to take their pictures, too?”

“Sure,” she says, getting up for the park bench they’re sitting. “They won’t mind, right?”

“I doubt it.”

They walk back to one of the houses near the church, where Javi and Kate and David are all staying with some other people—everyone doing their best to recover, rebuild the place.

But as soon as they get there, the first person they literally bump into—

Is David.

Clementine hides the polaroid with one hand and waves back to the park with the other. “I will…find something to do. See you later, Gabe,” she says in a hush, already starting to run.

“Clementine—wait,” David calls back, voice softer than she ever heard. And she stops. Doesn’t know what really compels her to do it, but she stops. But she barely looks at him, only looks over her shoulder for a second. “Can I…speak with you? Both of you?”

“I don’t think—” she starts saying, but he interrupts her with:

“I owe you an apology. You and Gabriel. I…I had no right…what I did before…I wasn’t thinking. I need to apologize.”

She sighs, though she does turn around this time.

“You did what you thought was best,” she says. “Nothing more.”

“Still! Can’t you just let a man apologize?”

“Dad, we understand—”

“ _No,_ ” David cuts Gabe off with an angry look—though it’s not directed to either of them. “No, Gabriel. If you really understand, then you shouldn’t. Because _I_ don’t. What I know is that this world is living through a war that won’t end—we all know it won’t. And that…that made me think. I want to become a better man, but maybe that’s just not possible. Maybe this world is…where I should be. So I wanted to apologize to both of you—for everything—before I leave.”

“What?” Gabe and Clementine ask at the same time—though Gabe sounds more shocked. When he remains silent, just staring at his father, Clem continues, “Leaving now is what a coward would do, David. And I know you’re many things—but a coward? I didn’t peg you as one.”

He scoffs back at her, arms crossed over his chest.

“You can’t leave!” Gabe insists. “We just…we just found each other, Dad. You can’t leave now.”

“You know, Gabe, when you were born, Pa told me something,” David says, dropping to his knees in front of his son. “He said that it takes everything in us to raise a child—not money or patience, but _everything._ And now I understand…that I never did that with you or Mari, never was good enough.”

“This is stupid—”

“Listen to me, Gabe. I’m telling you that it…it’s alright. I wasn’t enough. But Javi and Kate? They were. They raised you. I can…understand that. And accept it.”

“But I need you too!”

“And I thank you for saying that, _mi hijo_. Loyalty is important in this life—and especially in this world. But—”

“David, shut up for a minute,” Clementine interrupts him, hands on her hips. “ _You_ listen to me now. When Richmond is safe again, I’m going to go out there and look for AJ. And I’ll bring him back here, and we’ll keep him safe. And…you told me you took care of him for as long as I did. Right? Don’t you think…don’t you think that he’d be happy to see you here, when we come back?”

She doesn’t know where that comes from—doesn’t particularly like David yet—but the look of awe on Gabe’s face is more than worth it. And she thinks that it’s going to make Javi happy, too. And they’re her friends, took care of her. The least she can do is return the favor.

David looks really taken aback by her question, and stays silent for a long moment until he asks, “Do you think…do you honestly believe he’s even going to remember me?”

“We won’t know if you’re not here,” she says with a shrug.

He mulls it over, looks at her and then Gabe and then back at her. Then he nods. “Alright. I’ll stay for a while longer. But only until you bring AJ back.”

“Thanks, Dad,” Gabe says with a smile. When David leaves the building to do whatever he does with his time these days, Gabe smiles at her. “Thank you, too, Clem. I…I didn’t think it’d be possible to convince him to stay. He’s…having a hard with Kate and Javi being together. And I don’t know how to help him. Maybe…maybe AJ’ll help.”

She wastes no time and hugs him—super tightly, like she used to hug Lee, Luke, Kenny, Jane and every one of them.

“You help just by being here,” she tells him. “Never doubt it.”

He nods—though he doesn’t look all that sure about himself.

“Hey, what about looking for Javi and Kate now, getting pictures of them?” she asks, trying to lighten his mood. “Then we can play euchre. Right?”

“No, Clem, wait.” Gabe grabs her hand to stop her from moving. “I…I want to go with you. Looking for AJ. If that’s going to help my dad in the end, then I want to go. And I want to go just to help you, too. I-I mean…I know you’re tough and can take care of yourself, but I-I want to help. And I want to meet AJ.”

She pauses, looking down at his hand in hers. “Are you sure? I don’t even know where to start looking, and the walkers…they are going to be everywhere.”

“I’m sure, Clem. I want to be there.”

“Then…it’s okay. We’ll go.”


	2. to the rescue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I still have uni stuff to do. It's awful and i can't wait for it to be over. But I didn't want to leave you guys hanging, so I guess I decided to post something shorter ???? I also hope my babies aren't too ooc. If they are, feel free to scream.

“Clem! Clementine!” Javi comes running to her, waving his hands in the air like a maniac. “I have news! And it’s _great!_ ”

She drops the bag she was packing a moment ago to give him her full attention. “What happened?”

“I spoke with Lingard,” he says proudly, beaming. “He’s a moody son of a bitch, but he told me where he left AJ.”

If she hadn’t dropped her bag before, she’d have now. Yes, she was going after AJ anyway, but to have an actual location? Awesome. More than awesome. Brilliant.

“Where?” she breathes out, hands twitching with the need to hold AJ again. “ _Where, Javi?_ ”

“McCarroll Ranch. I…I’m not sure where it is exactly, but Lingard said it’s not far from here. Said there was a woman taking care of him, but Lingard doesn’t remember her name. Probably was too stoned to remember. But Clem, did you hear me? He’s not far from here! We can get him back!”

God, the way he keeps beaming. He never met AJ, and yet…he cares so much. It makes Clem’s heart hurt, but in a good way. She did find good people here, didn’t she? The García family, they are…good. They don’t deserve the world they were thrust into, but if it’s up to her? She’ll make sure they don’t have to suffer like she did.

“Thank you, Javi,” she says, hugging him tightly. “Thank you _so_ much. I…I’ll go after him right now. I can’t wait any longer.”

“I figured that much.” He chuckles, but his face falls a little a second later. “But after you find him…you’ll come back, right? You’ll bring him back here? I’ll teach you both baseball, Clem!”

She smiles, still hugging Javi. “Of course I’ll come back. Here, it’s a safe place for AJ.” And honestly, she’s not ready to let Javi, Gabe or the rest of their family go. Yeah, she’s bound to lose them some time. Probably soon—judging from how rotten her luck is. But until that happens, she won’t abandon them.

“That’s great!”

“And you still owe me a car, you know?” Clementine raises one eyebrow playfully, pulling Javi away.

He laughs out loud—that good, free laugh that people in Richmond are starting to learn again.

“Sure, Clem. I’ll see what I can do about that.”

She’s about to smile even more—maybe laugh with him, because now that she knows she can get AJ back she can smile and laugh and be happy again—when her heart drops.

“Oh. Javi, there’s…there’s something I need to tell you…”

“What?” He frowns. “Is David giving you any trouble? I…I spoke with him earlier, and he seemed fine. Said he talked with you, and things were looking good. But—”

“It’s not David,” she interrupts his rant. “It’s…it’s Gabe.”

Javi’s frown deepens even more—like he can’t possibly fathom what she’s on about. He probably can’t. “What about Gabe? I thought you two were doing okay? I mean, you’re not…I don’t know, you’re not thinking about giving him the cold shoulder because I was teasing you earlier?”

“Javi, stop. Calm down,” she says, raising her hands to placate him. “We’re fine. Though I’d really prefer if you didn’t tease us, now that you mentioned it.”

“Okay, no teasing. No teasing. I promise.”

“Gabe and I…well…he said…he said he wanted to come with me. To look for AJ,” she blurts out before losing the guts to do it. When Javi remains silent, staring at her blankly, she twists her fingers together. “Say something!”

He sighs. “What can I say, Clem? We know how he’s like. I saw it when he decided he wanted to go with David before. And…if you promise me that you’re both going to look after each other, well…”

Taking a deep breath, she nods. “Thanks, Javi. I promise we’re both going to be alright.”

“Then I guess there’s not much I can say. Just…bring him back to me, okay?” Javi runs his hands over his face. “David can’t ever hear this, but sometimes I feel…I feel like Gabe’s mine, you know? And if I lose him…God, I don’t know. I wouldn’t be able—”

“It’s not going to happen,” Clementine cuts him off, as categorically as she can. “I promise. If there’s one thing I can tell you, Javi, it’s that AJ and Gabe are going to come back.”

She prays he doesn’t catch on her hidden words, her fears. But it’s Javi. Of course he catches what she _isn’t_ saying, because his eyes soften even more than usual and he offers her a hand.

“ _You_ need to come back, too. We still have lots of work here.”

Clementine looks away from him, not managing to find her voice as the time keeps tick-tocking in her ears. Finally, she settles on, “Can you do me a favor, though? I…I don’t think this is right, but I honestly don’t see what else to do. So…please, can you keep this from David and Kate? At least until Gabe and I leave.”

“Clem…” his eyes widen, and he scratches the back of his neck nervously. “I don’t know about that…”

“Please, Javi. I really don’t think this is the best thing to do, but there’s no other way. Plus, you know I’ll bring him back.”

He sighs, the hand holding hers tightening its hold. “Okay. Okay, I’ll do it. But you _have_ to come back. As soon as possible.”

“As soon as possible,” she agrees, hugging him. “Thank you.”

* * *

 

When she doesn’t find Gabe in the park or the walker-free alleys, she moves to the apartment he shares with Javi and Kate.

As her luck has it, though, Kate is the one to answer when she knocks.

“Clem?” Kate asks, already ushering Clementine inside and closing the door. “Did something happen? I don’t think Javi’s here.”

 _Yup, because I just spoke with him_ , she thinks with a sigh. Damn, lying is the most awful thing ever. But in their world, lying is a must sometimes.

“Oh, it’s okay,” she tells Kate instead. “I wanted to speak with Gabe, actually.”

Kate’s beam overcomes her entire face—in a way that probably hurts her, really—and Clem feels her cheeks heating up. Why is it that both Javi and Kate are like that? _They_ are the dorks in love, fooling around. _She_ isn’t a dork and isn’t interested in becoming one. She’s most certainly not in love either.

Trying to hide her giggles and smiles and _yucks_ , Kate gestures to the corridor behind her. “He’s in the kitchen—you already know the way, right?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Clem answers, waving Kate off to try and stop feeling like _this_.

 _This_ being incredibly awkward, embarrassed, confused and _most certainly not in love._

“Clem, wait!” Kate calls her, making her go completely still.

“Yeah?” she asks over her shoulder.

The long pause from Kate compels her to believe the other woman is waiting for her to turn around, waiting for _something_. So she does turn around—and finds Kate staring at her feet, biting her lower lip hard.

Sighing, Clem makes her way to Kate, nudging her shoulder gently to get her attention again.

“Oh, sorry!” Kate blushes, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “I was just…just trying to figure out the best way to say this. Listen, I know I’m not even close to being your mom. Being anyone’s mom, really. But…I mean…after our talk before, I thought I should…”

Kate pauses again, and Clem frowns. Where is she getting at? What is she talking about? Kate usually is such an open book to Clem, her emotions and thoughts written across her entire face.

But now?

Now Clem has no idea what in the world Kate is talking about.

And so she waits, hoping the woman will find a way to express whatever it is that’s troubling her.

“I don’t know if it’s something you realize,” Kate starts again, her face crimson, “but now that you’ve become a woman, your body is getting ready to have children. _One day_. Not right now. Obviously. But, uh, well…it also means that boys will…start to get…attracted to you, in a more…romantic way. God, I’m not sure if I’m making sense right now,” Kate moans, slapping her forehead with one hand.

But she _is_ making sense, and Clem’s starting to understand where this is going. If her face was completely hot and red before, now…she has no idea.

“Kate—” she tries to interrupt the woman, but _she_ is interrupted instead.

“No, no, just listen. Please. I don’t think anyone told you this before, and it is…it’s important. _Listen._ Oh my God, I so wish I didn’t have to do this. It’ll probably be a while until I look at you in the eye again after this, but here it goes: you and Gabe are spending an awful lot of time together now and…I really don’t know if this is something that even crossed his mind yet, but Clem… _please_ …if something happens… _and it shouldn’t happen, by the way!_ But _if_ something happens…you need to use p—”

“Hi, Clem!”

She’s so, so red now. She doesn’t have words. She can’t even think straight.

But one thing Clem is sure—she’s never been more grateful and more mortified to see Gabe before. In one hand, _thank God and everything in between_ that Kate shut up. But…it’s also going to be a while until she can look at both Kate and Gabe in the eye after that. God. Why did Kate have to say that? _Why?_

“Is there…something wrong?” Gabe asks, frowning, running his hands over his hair—every once in a while, Clem noticed, he ditched his beanie. “I mean, if you two want to talk—”

“No!” Clem exclaims, running away from Kate, desperate to put some distance between them. It won’t erase stuff from her mind, but it has to be enough for now. “No, no, no. I-I mean…I…I have something I need to tell you.”

He nods—though he still looks as confused as ever. “Okay. Let’s go then. You okay, right, Kate?” Though he doesn’t wait for his stepmother’s answer, just snakes his arm around Clem’s to drag them away.

Even when they’re inside the only bedroom in the apartment, each of them sitting in a fluffy chair, she doesn’t think her face is back to normal.

“Did something happen?” Gabe tries, voice low. “You look a little…green?”

 _Well, funny you say that. I thought I was red—but maybe green_ is _a better choice of word_ , she thinks with a snort.

Instead of voicing her thoughts, Clem forces Kate’s words to go away, disappear, and says, “I’m fine. I spoke with Javi, and he told me where AJ is.”

“Really?” Gabe beams. “That’s great! Do you know how to get there?”

“Kind of,” she answers with a sigh. “I have a map. But that’s not important. I mean, yeah, it is. But that’s not why I’m here. I…told Javi you wanted to come with me…”

“Yeah? What did he say?”

“He’s okay as long as you don’t get killed or eaten or anything that could potentially happen.”

“Oh…wow. That’s nice. I mean, I didn’t think he’d agree. You probably just were super convincing.”

She waves him off, face feeling like it can get red again at any minute. “Yeah, yeah. The thing is, we need to go tonight. I made Javi promise he wouldn’t say anything to David and Kate—because they’d flip—but we have to go. I don’t know how long AJ has, or if he’s even where Lingard said…”

Gabe touches her hand with his index and ring finger gently, a barely-there sort of touch. “Hey, don’t worry. He’s okay. We’re going to find him, Clem. We will. And yeah, I guess it’s a good idea to leave today. You help me pack?”

* * *

 

They leave after everyone eats and goes to sleep. Clem doesn’t miss the sad look Javi kept sending her, but she forces herself not to think about him now. She can’t think about him. Her friend. Someone she might not see again if she fails this mission. If she dies.

It’s far from Richmond when she starts to breathe again, to feel like it’s okay and they are not going to get caught. A part of her was honestly expecting David o jump from the shadows, berating her for taking his son away without his permission. If she’s honest with herself, part of her actually _hoped_ David would appear, convince her that it’s not okay to be taking Gabe with her.

But it doesn’t happen.

“Hey, what the hell was Kate talking about before?” Gabe asks, shattering her thoughts.

Though she’s not sure which sort of thought she’d prefer to have now.

“Nothing,” she says quickly, almost swallowing a few letters. “She just…wanted to discuss something I asked her.”

“Yeah? What about?”

“ _Nothing._ ”

He doesn’t look offended at her harsh tone, but he raises his arms in surrender, face a little shocked. “Gee, okay. Sorry I asked.”

They stay in an awkward silence after this, barely looking at each other. It’s a good thing, in a way, because it allows Clem to stay sharp. Keep her eyes and ears open for any sort of sight or sound that shouldn’t be there.

Walkers.

_Muertos._

Lurkers.

Whatever. She doesn’t care how they’re called, she just wants them away. From her and everyone she cares about. Maybe they’re all infected and doomed to become one of the things sometime soon, but that doesn’t matter. For now they’re alive, and so the things need to stay away.

They took Lee away. Took Luke. Her parents. Sarah. Duck. Even took Sandra from her.

With a sad weight taking over her heart, Clementine shifts her eyes to take a look at Gabe. Make sure he’s alright, he’s still breathing, he’s still human. He doesn’t miss it, and clears his throat before whispering:

“You don’t have to answer it if you don’t want, but…where did you get your hat? I’ve always wondered.”

Her hand flies to the old, battered thing in a heartbeat. Sometimes she even forgets it’s there. But it’s meaning, everything it saw, this can never be forgotten.

“My dad,” she whispers, hand still caressing the cap like it might actually be touching her parents’ skin. “I don’t remember much, but he was a huge fanatic for this small league team in Virginia, Danville Braves. He bought the hat for a game—which I remember we lost, by the way—and he thought it was bad luck or whatever. Wanted to throw the thing away. I cried until he gave it to me instead.”

She wouldn’t _ever_ throw the old thing away, but she does wonder if it brings her bad luck. But that’s silly. Everyone’s luck is rotten these days. It’s not the hat’s fault.

“Oh…” Gabe whispers back, his hand making a move to touch hers again. She can see his struggle, and when he decides to keep his hand to himself, she grabs it with hers. His shy smile is a good reward. “I’m sorry. Please don’t tell Javi this—and I mean it, like ever—but I’m not a great baseball fan. I mean, it doesn’t matter now. But before. And I don’t recognize the teams. But maybe he does?”

Clementine giggles, shaking her head like he told her something really funny. Maybe sadness and being on edge for too long does that to a person. Maybe people laugh because of stupid things.

“Oooh, thank you for such a good blackmail material!”

“No! You can’t do that!”

“Really? Let’s wait until you piss me off and we’ll see,” she jokes, glad her brain can use a distraction.

Gabe laughs with her, scratching the back of his neck exactly the same way Javi does. But as it’s doomed to be, their playful mood dissolves to sad and worried sighs after barely two minutes.

“You think my dad will stay for good? In Richmond, with us?” he asks, looking away as if to avoid her knowing gaze. She wants to remind him that she’s _knowing_ and not _judgmental_.

“I don’t know. When I met him before, he was…different from what he’s trying to become now. I know he says to everyone who can hear him that he wants to change but can’t, but…I think he _is_ changing.”

“And that means there’s a chance he’ll stay?”

“Maybe. I think, he has all the reasons to stay, right? If he stays, he’ll have you near him. I’m not really a parent, but I feel like AJ is mine and…being away from him…is awful. I guess David feels even stronger about you than that.”

“He seems to feel strongly about AJ, too.”

Clem smiles. “Little goofball does that to people.” Then her brain catches up with what Gabe said, and she sighs. “But that doesn’t mean David doesn’t love you, Gabe. You know he does.”

She can almost hear him speaking, muttering, _but not enough to stay for me_. But Gabe remains silent, frown etched on his face while he stares straight ahead.

“I guess all that matters is him staying anyway,” he says instead, a dark shadow looming inside his eyes. “Can we talk about something else?”

She wants to tell him he’s the one who started the conversation, but bites her lip to shut up. Gabe gets hurt so easily, and she doesn’t want to risk saying something bad.

“Yeah, sure. What do you want to talk about?” she asks with a smile.

“I don’t know.” Gabe shrugs. “You think Javi and Kate are going to get married one day?”

“I don’t think…people get married anymore. There isn’t time for that.”

She remembers Jane and Luke, then. A shadowy memory, something her mind is trying to forget to store new memories instead. They had a thing, didn’t they? Thinking back to their relationship, it was kind of what Javi and Kate do when they want to be alone.

But Jane and Luke didn’t have time, not like Javi and Kate do now. Or seem to have. One can never be sure.

There were Christa and Omid, too, but Clem’d wager they got married before the walkers started taking over the world.

“Of course there’s time!” Gabe protests, frown getting deeper. “If they want to be happy, then there’s time. I mean…it’s not that I think about it…not a lot anyway…but if one day it happens…I mean…I’d still like to be with someone. The right way, like Papa García used to talk about. Have an honest relationship or whatever he meant.”

“I think it’s a great thought,” Clem starts, “but still, I don’t believe people can actually get married. Where would you find a ring? A preacher? And who would you invite to the wedding? The walkers?”

A great part of her mind knows she’s a little bitter with life—after everything it took from her, how could she _not_ be bitter?—but another part understands she’s just frustrated.

Surprisingly, Gabe chuckles. Then he laughs out loud.

“What?” she asks, crossing her arms protectively over her chest. “What’s so funny?”

“It’s just…” he chuckles, shaking his head. “I’m imagining a _muerto_ in a suit, drinking and cheering with other _muertos_. I guess it’s an image I should store for when I’m scared of them and need a distraction.”

She shakes her head, trying to hide her amusement. To clear her mind, she takes another look at the map Javi gave her, trying to locate where she is now that she moved a little. McCarroll Ranch is still a little far—maybe they’ll need to walk until after the sun rises—but she can’t lose hope. She’ll get there. She has to.

* * *

 

Two hours after the sun is up and shining in the sky, Clementine spots a road that looks like it might lead to a ranch. At least, it reminds her of the road she and Lee and the Motor-Inn group took when they went to that awful dairy.

“Shit, Clem… _shit_. Is that…?” Gabe grips her arm, hands shaking and sweating.

“Yeah, it is,” she says with a nod, already reaching for the new pistol Javi gave her especially for this mission.

Far ahead of them is a ranch, and it _really_ looks like the St. John’s Dairy—Clem can swear she even sees a broken swing there.

But that’s not all.

Surrounding the ranch is a herd.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i did say i didn't want to finish this with a cliffhanger, /sighs but it was a cliffhanger or wait for a week until i was done writing this


	3. building for tomorrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos always make me happy--just saying, you know.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this! it certainly brought a smile to my face despite the angst.

Usually the smartest thing to do when a herd is involved, Clem knows, is to find a way to _run_ from it. Put as much distance from the walkers as possible.

But she would _never_ run if facing a herd is what stands between her and being reunited with AJ. She needs the goofball back, can’t pretend she doesn’t. It’s been too long. More than enough.

She wonders, for a brief, painful moment, if this is how Lee felt when she was kidnapped in Savannah. No matter how long it’s been behind her, she wouldn’t be able to forget the strange man who kept a walker head inside a bag. Used to speak with it, too. It makes her shiver just by thinking back.

“What’re we going to do to get through them?” Gabe asks in a small, quiet voice. _He’s learning fast_ , she thinks with a smile. A walker can still smell them if it gets close enough, but she’s damn sure it won’t _hear_ them.

“Let me think for a minute,” she answers, her voice barely more than a whisper.

Killing the walkers one by one is out of question. She remembers doing it more than once before, but only when there are ten walkers tops.

Old-fashioned method of covering themselves in guts _could_ work, but they’d need to get close to at least one walker first. That didn’t seem like a very likely option when the things are all huddled up together, shouldering past each other against the fences of the ranch.

Gabe nudges her shoulder, a thoughtful expression on his face, but says nothing.

“What?” she asks, exasperated.

“Well, I think I…I have an idea. How good are you at climbing?”

Clementine sighs. “Climbing _what?_ ”

“Trees,” Gabe answers with a shrug, his cheeks coloring a little. He gestures around them with one hand before saying, “There are tons of trees surrounding us. If we use them, we can get past the fences and into the ranch.”

This time, it’s _her_ face that colors slightly. “I had a treehouse, before the walkers. And…and when L—I mean, when I first found survivors, I was hidden up in the trees. But it’s been a long time.”

“You think we can try, though?”

“I don’t really think we have other options,” she says with a sigh, running her hands over her face. When they start preparing to climb the nearest tree, she blurts, “You know, I once met this woman. Molly, I think. She was a great climber. She had this tool that helped her around, and she even named it.”

Gabe jumps up and up and up in the tree, offering her a hand all the while. “Yeah? What happened to her?”

 _Just don’t think about what you’re doing_ , she tells herself, repeating it like a mantra. It doesn’t matter that it’s been a long time, she still can do this sort of thing.

“I have no idea,” she answers Gabe, focusing on their conversation. “She left our group without saying anything. Never heard of her again.”

“That’s a good thing,” he tells her with a small smile, encouraging her to keep going. “Means she can still be alive, right?”

“Yeah, maybe.” When her eyes search for the ranch again, she has to suppress a gasp. They moved a lot, and are definitely getting closer to their destination, the herd and AJ. “But there’s something I know for sure—the last time I was on a farm, it was bad. So be prepared for anything.”

“Bad?” Gabe’s voice wavers. He clears his throat the next second, and she smiles at how he really wants to look strong. “How bad? What I should be prepared for?”

“Anything,” she repeats. “I mean it.”

He nods. “But what happened?”

“I…we were starving. There just wasn’t any food left, and people were starting to fight,” she tells him, closing her eyes for a moment when the memories threaten to overwhelm her. “Until this family appears, out of nowhere. They wanted to trade something—gas, I think. They swore they had lots of food, enough to feed our entire group for months.”

When she pauses, her eyes still closed, her body refusing to move to the next tree, Gabe approaches her quietly. He touches her hand with his, just a small sort of contact.

“And then?”

“We went with them, of course,” she continues. “Once we got on the farm, they wanted help with some things. It was fine. But…but then a guy got hurt. The family said they would help him, make sure he got better. But when we asked if we could stay with him, see if he was alright, they wouldn’t let us. My—uh…Lee…one of the guys in our group figured out what was happening by the time dinner was served.”

“What dinner has to do with anything?”

Clementine smirks at him—though there is hardly any humor in her face. “ _He_ —the injured man—was dinner. If it weren’t for Lee, I’d have eaten his flesh and never realized the truth.”

All color leaves Gabe’s face—and he swallows one, two, three times.

“What?!” he asks in a shrill, high-pitched voice. “The guy was dinner!”

“Keep your voice down,” she hisses, eyes flying to the herd again. It’s so much closer to them, but the walkers are still unaware of their presence. _Dinner._

“But they ate a person!” Gabe exclaims, though his voice lowers a little. “How—why—I mean…why would someone eat a person?”

Clementine shrugs. “It doesn’t matter. I only said that to prove a point—which is, keep your eyes open and stay sharp. We don’t know what we’re going to find on that ranch.”

Though Gabe remains silent, she can almost hear his thoughts— _I don’t want to become dinner, I don’t want to be eaten…_

She didn’t find it funny back then—and she really doesn’t find cannibalism funny now either—but it’s…amusing how life can suck sometimes. It’s like they have two choices—be eaten by a dead monster who was human once upon a time; or be eaten by someone that’s still human but acts like a monster.

Their conversation is cut short when they reach the fence, the walkers right under their feet. Clem barely breathes at all. She looks at Gabe in the eye, and gestures for him to start climbing to the inside of the property.

He does, his face pale and sweaty. The moment his feet hit the ground with a dull _thud!_ , she smiles.

But when it’s her turn, one of her legs is already over the fence and her heartbeat is crazy and—

A walker grabs her ankle. And tugs her down, surprisingly strong for someone whose limbs are pretty much rotten.

She wants to scream. But still, her instincts are stronger, and her mouth just hangs open, no sound coming out at all. If she screams, more walkers will notice her. And if that happens, it’s over. She’s done.

But she isn’t done just _yet_.

Something—someone, possibly Gabe—kicks the walker through the fence and pulls her to him at the same time, successfully saving her from the walker’s clutches.

Or kind of.

Since the thing’s hand is still attached to Clementine’s ankle. She kicks it angrily with her free leg, and the hand lands on the other side of the fence, in the middle of the walkers. They are not even startled by it, the stupid things.

“Damn,” she whispers, taking a deep breath. When she looks at Gabe, he’s completely unsettled, staring at the walkers, breathing in ragged puffs of air. “Gabe, it’s okay now. Thanks. You…thanks.”

He shakes his head. “I-I n-never touched one of t-them before.”

Carefully, Clementine wraps her hand around his, trying to ground him to reality. When it doesn’t work, she tiptoes a little to get taller and kisses his cheek.

She’s careful not to allow it to last more than three seconds, but it has the desired effect nonetheless—Gabe stops staring at the walkers to move his bewildered gaze to her, and his face colors.

“Wow…” he says, touching his cheek with two fingers. “Can you do it again?”

Clementine blushes—but still manages to roll her eyes at him. “Yeah, maybe some other time. If you’re lucky.”

Sometimes, she feels like Jane is still with her. Whispering what to do, how to act around boys. It’s…scary. But she’s grateful for Jane’s presence. Real or imaginary.

“Come on now,” she says, gesturing to the ranch ahead of them. The path is clear, every walker behind them. For now. She has no idea how long the fence will hold them—her history with fences is that they’re never really good—but it’ll have to do. The mission is go to the ranch, take AJ, get out, go back to Richmond. Easy.

After they’ve walked for a while—and the small, wooden house is near—Gabe whispers, “It’s super quiet now, isn’t it? I can’t hear the _muertos_ anymore.”

“Better this way.” She shrugs. “But if it makes you feel better, we’ll need to get past them again once we grab AJ.”

“Yeah, it doesn’t make me feel better at all.”

“We can check the barn later, see if there’s a car here or something. I need a car anyway.”

Gabe pauses—and when she stops walking to look at him, he’s staring at the ground like it was personally responsible for every bad thing that ever happened to him.

“Gabe?”

“You’re going to leave, then?” he asks—almost _accuses_ her, the hurt flowing freely in his voice. “After everything…after everything we’ve been through, you’re just going to leave us?”

“No!” she exclaims, raising her hands. “I just…of course I won’t leave. Javi already made me promise to stay. It’s just that having a car is important. I’ve been looking for one—this way, I can go to other places more safely. Get supplies. And stuff.”

“Not like it matters to me anyway,” he mutters, shouldering past her. “Let’s just…keep walking.”

Clementine frowns and runs to catch up with him. “Gabe, I’m _really_ not going to leave. Why are you acting like that?”

“You’re not going to leave because _Javi_ asked you to stay. Even…even if Kate asked, you’d probably listen to her.”

“Yeah. I would. And that’s a bad thing because—?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It clearly does!”

He comes to a halt, almost making her run into his back. When he turns to finally look at her, Clementine can swear there are _tears_ in his eyes.

“It…I’m just never enough, am I? If I asked…it’d be different,” he mumbles, covering his face with both hands. “Look at how well it went I asked Dad to stay. People just…people just don’t stay for me.” His accent gets thicker the more nervous he gets—and by the end of his last sentence, Clementine can barely hear what he’s saying.

But she does hear his words. And it hurts her to see someone like that. Especially because, really, she doesn’t understand it. If people are staying, they are staying. It doesn’t matter who asked.

Gabe reminds her of Sarah—so easily hurt, so open about everything.

She used to do everything for Sarah, didn’t she? But what usually cheered the girl up? She can’t remember. Too many bad memories muddling up the good ones.

Taking a deep breath, taking a leap of faith really, she walks closer to him, her hand coming to rest on his dirty cheek. Looking at them now, though, they are both dirty. Covered in mud and dry leaves and blood from their scratches.

“I…” she swallows, trying to make the words get the hell out of her mouth. “I always thought…I’d be alone.”

His eyes jump to hers, and she swallows again. God, why is this so hard? Why her legs feel like they’re going to make her fall on her knees from their shaking?

But she needs to do this. For him and for her. She opens her fingers over his cheek, caressing it like Christa and Omid used to do with each other. So long ago. How is it that she even remembers little things?

“I always thought I’d be alone,” she repeats, keeping herself focused. “Then I met you.”

It’s not something she was planning. Not at all. Especially not after all of Javi’s teasing and Kate’s knowing looks. But still, Javi and Kate and everyone is far from her mind when she gently pulls his face towards hers, closing her eyes after he closes his. Then she touches her lips to his.

Differently from what she had thought, it’s…weird. Not kissing _him_ , but _kissing._ It’s wet. And different. She never ever touched her lips to someone else’s, had absolutely no idea what to expect from it.

But the thoughts fly out of her mind when she realizes just _what_ she’s doing. She’s actually, honestly kissing someone. Gabe. She just never…she _was_ being honest with him, before. She never thought about this sort of thing. But it just felt so natural, fitting.

Wet and odd or not, it was still nice. A good memory to treasure among so many bad ones. She hopes it’ll become a good memory to Gabe, too.

Finally, when she doesn’t know what to do with herself anymore, she breaks their contact. He doesn’t let her go completely away though, not yet. Instead, he does something that, to her, seems like instinct alone—he bumps their noses together, earning a smile from her.

“That…” he whispers after bumping their noses one more time and letting go of her free hand. “That…did you mean it, Clem?”

Clementine nods, not finding her voice just yet. Then, after clearing her throat, she answers, “I’m more serious right now than I’ve ever been.”

“Wow.” A smile covers his entire face and he looks—he looks…like he’s glowing with happiness or something. She feels a strange bubble in her heart, too. Something that she never felt there before. Clem doesn’t have a name for it, though. “Wow, Clem.”

When he offers her his hand to hold, it’s shaking so much. She looks down at hers to see it shaking, too. How…how is it that her body can react like this? It never reacted like this to anything. Never.

Smiling to cover her sudden nervousness over her acts, she grabs his hand and they start moving again. If they find AJ today…then she doesn’t think her heart had ever been this happy. It never really had the time to be happy.

She thinks that maybe, maybe now she understands Kate better. Why she clings to Javi every time she can, why the two of them are always together. But she also understands what feeling like this regarding someone means—they could be separated at any time, for any reason at all.

Look at Christa and Omid, Luke and Jane, Kenny and Katjaa. It’s always like that.

Her heart aches at her pessimist thoughts, and she honestly tries to brush them off. Crush her fears. But when it doesn’t happen, she just tells herself that all it means is that they need to enjoy the time they have.

She thinks about the good memories they already have—and the new ones to come. They’ll have to be enough, won’t they?

With everything inside her hurting, she squeezes his hand as tightly as she can.

“Are you…okay?” Gabe asks, pausing for a second to look at her.

“I’m okay,” she promises, nudging him so they can keep moving. “Just thinking about old things.”

Old friends.

Who aren’t coming back.

“You want to talk about it?” he offers with a smile.

But shakes her head. There are a few things…that she’s just not ready not share yet. Maybe one day she’ll be able to tell him what she’s afraid of, how she doesn’t want history to keep repeating itself. But now is not the time.

“Later. After we’re back in Richmond, we can talk about it.”

As an answer to her once again making it clear that yes, she’s going to stay, he squeezes her hand like she did before.

Funny, Clementine realizes, how easy it is to hold hands with someone. There might be walkers everywhere, but she still finds it nice.

The house is so near now—but Clem thinks they are starting to walk slower.

“Can I ask you something?” Gabe suddenly asks, looking down once again.

Feeling bold by their earlier actions, she touches his face again, lightly, until he looks up in her eyes. “You can always ask me anything.”

“Even if it’s silly?”

“Of course.”

“What…what are we going to tell Javi, Dad and Kate?”

She frowns. “I honestly don’t know yet. Maybe we could just keep it quiet for a while? You know, keep it between us. Like it’s…something that’s only ours.”

“I…okay,” he says with a nod. “I like having it as something that’s only ours.”

Clementine returns his nod, and they make it to the house in silence. Once there, she’s all for busting the door open and running inside like a mad woman until she finds her goofball.

But Gabe is more…delicate about it. He knocks.

She’s more than a little surprise when someone actually opens the door—at least a little bit of the door—with a rifle in hand.

“What do you want?” the voice asks. A woman—like Javi had mentioned, right? “Who are you?”

Clem takes a deep breath. “Dr. Lingard told us you were taking care of a little boy. AJ. We’re here to take him back to…the new frontier.”

The last thing Clementine hears before the door is thrown back on her face is a snort, followed by, “I don’t answer to the new frontier for a long time.”


	4. family values

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this ages ago, and for some reason I never actually posted it. Don't ask me why, I wouldn't know. Maybe because it's super short and I wanted to make it longer. Either way, here it is now! Yours truly is now a hardcore shipper of Louisentine and Violentine, and maybe I'll write something for these other pairings later on. I'm just still heartbroken about the Telltale news, as I imagine you all are. That's why I decided to finish this story at last. And honestly, I really hope we'll get to see the end of season 4.

Even though the woman slams the door in Clem’s face, there’s still time to make up some of her features. She’s tall, has a beautiful heart-shaped face and a shoulder-length blonde hair that is covered in packs of dirt.

But _her eyes_. Clementine would recognize those eyes anywhere, anytime. Deep brown, almost black. Hardened.

Those are _Jane’s eyes._ But how could that be possible? Jane’s dead. Clem remember hearing about someone else, though. A sister. Jaime, isn’t it? But Jane said she was one hundred percent sure that Jaime died. Horribly, too. Much like Sarah.

Though Jane also said that she didn’t actually see her sister dying. She left before it happened.

Which means—

Clementine punches the door with as much as desperation as she can, her heart pounding. Gabe looks startled, but doesn’t say anything.

“Wait! Wait!” she keeps calling to the woman. “Is your name Jaime? Is that your name?”

The door is thrown open again—and if it weren’t for Gabe’s hand steadying her by the arm, she’d have fallen face-first to the ground.

“How do you know that?” The woman—Jaime!—asks, looking every bit like Jane when she crosses her arms protectively over her chest. “Who told you that?”

“Jane told me that,” Clementine says bluntly. “Your sister.”

Jaime’s mouth drops open, her eyes widened. “What? _How?_ Is Jane o—”

“Listen,” Clem interrupts her. “Can we come in?”

She nods half-mindedly, ushering both Clem and Gabe inside before locking the door. Jaime guides them to a living room, pushes them on a sofa and sits on another.

“Now tell me about Jane. Is she okay? Where is she?”

Clementine bites her lower lip, looking down. She sees Jane hanging from the ceiling, growling. A walker. Dead, but not dead. Suicidal. It makes the grief flood back to her heart, her head, her whole body.

“Jane died,” she whispers, running the back of her hands over her eyes. “Before I joined the New Frontier, I stayed with Jane. But…but she’s dead now.”

Jaime chokes on her sob, nodding. She barely looks at Clementine when she asks, “How did that happen? Did my sister…did she suffer?”

“She…she gave up,” Clementine says, breathing ragged. “I didn’t know she was going to do it. It was just…I don’t know. We were fine. I thought she was happy. But she…she discovered she was…p-pregnant. And then I found her…dead. Hanging from the fan in the ceiling.”

Gabe’s hand fly to clutch hers, keeping her grounded in reality. He never knew Jane, but he can still feel Clementine’s grief. And she appreciates his gesture very much, squeezes his hand back.

But in a fit of rage, Jaime jumps to her feet and punches one of the walls, tears streaking down her face. “Goddamn you, Jane! All that talk about never giving up, and it was all bullshit! She gave up in the end!” Her stormy eyes find Clem’s eyes, and she bellows, “Did you at least put her down?”

No. She couldn’t do it. Couldn’t shoot Jane, her friend. A mentor, much like Lee. A harsh, rude one. But still. To save Jane, she shot Kenny. Even today, she still wishes there could’ve been a way to save both.

But she can’t say that to Jaime, so she nods. “I did.”

“Good.” Jaime sighs, runs her calloused hands through her hair. “Good.”

“Where’s AJ?” Clementine asks after waiting a few seconds to give Jaime time to grief. She understands the pain. Feels it as well. But she needs her goofball. Her little boy. “Jaime, where’s he?”

The woman gestures vaguely around, not paying much attention. “Upstairs. He was sleeping when the herd started circling the ranch.”

She doesn’t think about it anymore, then. She just acts. Runs upstairs, almost tripping more than once.

Behind her, Clementine can hear Gabe saying something—but everything in her is focused in finding AJ.

And there he is, nestled in the middle of a bed, several blankets wrapped around his little body. Even asleep, he squirms and moves, never still. It warms her heart, to see her little boy again. Her little boy. So small, so fragile, so perfect.

Part of her is scared of touching him, of breaking him. But the bigger part of her heart spent much too long without him, can’t stay away anymore. So she gently climbs on the bed, touches her hand to his cheek. He stops squirming for a second or two.

And then his eyes open. Huge, curious, cautious.

It’s still such a vivid memory, that day when he said her name for the first time. She can still hear it in her mind, because this is such a treasured memory. She doesn’t expect him to say it again—half expects him to have completely forgotten about her.

But AJ’s eyes light up after he scans her his lips part just a tiny bit to form a smile.

“Clem?” he asks, his voice shaky and not confident. It doesn’t matter. It’s enough to melt her heart.

Clementine picks him up, hugs him as tightly as she can. “Yeah, goofball, it’s me. I came to get you back.”

“Home?” he asks, and she’s once again surprised at how willing he is to chat now. It also sends a pang of something to her chest, because it reminds her of how much time she already lost being away from him.

But she smiles, bright and alive, because she is here now, he is here now, and they’re a family again. “Yeah. Home.”

* * *

 

When she makes it downstairs, AJ firmly in her arms—like he was always supposed to be—Gabe and Jaime are silent, barely looking at each other. AJ giggles when he sees Jaime, though, and gestures to be picked up by her.

It stings, Clementine won’t say it doesn’t, but it also soothes her worries. If AJ is fond of Jaime, then it must mean she took good care of him. He was safe. He was alright.

“You must’ve missed him so much,” Jaime says, quietly picking up the goofball and ticking his belly. “I know how special he is. Right, AJ?”

He nods, though Clem can’t be sure if he really understood what Jaime spoke.

“I love him more than life itself,” she says, looking at Jaime’s eyes. She needs to understand, needs to see that AJ is her family as well. “I’ve missed him every single day.”

Gabe takes a moment to get up from the couch and go touch AJ, try to play with him. Her little goofball is a bit skeptical at first and she doesn’t blame him. She always taught him that they shouldn’t trust too easily. Soon, though, he warms up to Gabe and jumps to his arms, ready to steal Gabe’s red beanie.

The sight makes Clementine smile, but as soon as she looks back at Jaime’s sad eyes, her smile falters.

“Thank you,” she says, nodding to the older woman. “For taking care of him. I…appreciate it very much.”

Jaime nods. “I guess it’s the same Jane did for you.”

“Yes. Jane saved me more times than I can count—she…she was very special, too. I won’t ever forget her.”

“Good,” Jaime says, eyes hardening. “I won’t forget her either. And when I see her again, she and I…we’re gonna have some words.” Clementine doesn’t miss the lone tear that runs down Jaime’s cheek, but she doesn’t comment on it either. “Anyway, do you plan on taking AJ back…to the New Frontier? Are you sure this is the smartest idea?”

Clementine clears her throat. “It’s different from what it used to be. Most people that were leaders back then…are dead now.”

“I see.”

“I don’t think they’d mind if you came with us, too.” She isn’t sure what made her say that—perhaps fear that Jaime might follow Jane’s footsteps and take her own life if left alone—but Clementine doesn’t regret her words. From the corner of her eye, she sees Gabe nodding encouragingly at her before going back to playing with AJ.

Jaime looks taken aback for a moment. “I…don’t think there’s a place for me in this world anymore.”

“You never know,” Clementine insists. “There are plenty of good people in Richmond now. Kate, for example. You’d really like her.”

“I don’t know if I’m ready to join a group again,” Jaime says. “But I’ll help you get there in the morning either way. It’s easier to distract walkers when you’re not alone, and I wouldn’t mind saying goodbye to AJ.”

Clementine doesn’t push her luck, and nods instead. “And it’s okay if Gabe and I spend the night here? You won’t mind?”

“No,” Jaime says. “If anything, it might make this place less dead.” She pauses, smiling when her eyes move to AJ wearing Gabe’s beanie and giggling. “If you’ll excuse me, I…need to be alone for a moment.”

It’s sad, Clementine thinks, to see someone mourning and fighting against it. She’s mourned so much already, there’s no shame in it. But she figures that if Jaime is anything like Sarah, she definitely needs to take her own time to come to terms with how this world works.

Sighing, Clem makes a beeline for the couch where Gabe and AJ are.

“That was intense,” Gabe says, not taking his eyes from the goofball.

“Intense,” AJ agrees, struggling a bit with the new word.

Clementine chuckles, patting AJ’s little hand. “Yes, it was. But she’s going to be okay.”

 

* * *

 

In the morning, Clementine allows Jaime to carry AJ all the way to Richmond, keeping him safe and keeping herself from slipping too much into her grief. Instead, Clementine takes Gabe’s hand, and they only let go of each other when they make it back to Richmond, back to the gates where Kate is waving excitedly.

Jaime gently puts AJ’s in Clementine’s arms, already taking a step back into the woods.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay?” she tries one more time while AJ plays with her hair. If he’s managing to grab it, she probably should cut it some more soon. _Keep that hair short,_ Lee had said.

“I’m not ready,” Jaime says, eyes downcast. “Maybe one day.”

“We’ll be waiting for you,” she says, forces a smile. “AJ will be waiting for you. I’m sure he still needs you to be around.”

“Maybe,” Jaime says before turning around. She stops for a minute. “Take good care of him, will you?”

“Always.”

When Kate and Javi make it to the gate and are done hugging Gabe, Jaime has already disappeared.

Kate’s eyes are soft when she sees AJ, smiles and softly asks if it’s okay to hold him for a minute. When Clementine passes AJ to her, Gabe starts talking about all the things he spoke to AJ, all the time they spent playing.

Clementine, on the other hand, keeps her eyes on the woods until Javi touches her shoulder. “Are you okay?” he asks.

For a moment, she doesn’t know how to answer. But one look at Kate, Gabe and AJ—and Javi—has her nodding. “I’m fine,” she says.

She has a family here, something good going on. Maybe one day Jaime will come back. Either way, Clementine is happy to be here.

“I’m fine,” she repeats.


End file.
